Sometimes life punches you in the guts…

Welp…

So after posting my Elizabeth/Bioshock Infinite choker here I got some super awesome feedback and I was super excited. Holly sent me a super nice note and I was over the moooon! (Thanks Commander Holly! ^_^) I was so motivated to do more things after that.

But then life happened. Work turned crazy. I worked nights and weekends. Doctor’s appointments, vet appointments and worst of all…My boyfriend and I got the news that our beloved cat Mocha had a tumor in her stomach larger than a ping pong ball. We’ve since had it removed and the news isn’t much better. Her type of cancer is malignant and incurable. The tumor will grow back. Even chemo wouldn’t do much but buy her more time.

We’re devastated. It’s been a rough couple of weeks. She’s our little baby and I can’t believe we only have less than a year left with her.

I have had some time to sculpt some new things, just to get my mind off of stuff. So I thought I’d post them here. I want my tumblr to be full of projects and stuff that I create…but it’s a slow start….especially with everything going on at the moment.

Thanks for all for the support (^_^). I still want to make cool things so the drive it still there…that’s good right?

Here’s the Salts bottle I sculpted for my currently unfinished Elizabeth cosplay…

And here is a trophy I sculpted for our semi-impromptu Pokemon X & Y tournament at work. All participants will get one!

Hopefully things in the future will start working in my favor so I can get some more projects rolling. I want to make ALL THE THINGS. <3

Today I made a thing….and i’m super happy with it.

I’ve been going through some rough times these past couple of months. I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety, panic disorder and OCD. It’s been a whirlwind of medication, therapy…and trying to cope with what feels like my brain trying to unravel itself.


I haven’t been able to do anything artistic or creative. The thought of picking up a pencil or my cintiq pen was overwhelming. So much guilt and anxiety was associated with my art…mainly due to my fear of never being good enough to fufill my dreams of being an artist full time.

To fill the void of art, I mainly watched YouTube. After seeing Pacific Rim I found myself gravitating towards an old passion of mine: prosthetic makeup and costuming. Growing up I was obsessed with watching behind the scenes footage of movies and how they made the costumes and elaborate makeup which brought the movies to life. And that’s when I found Crabcat. Try This at Home! was the perfect way for me to turn my longtime wishes of getting into cosplay/costuming a reality. I watch Heroes of Cosplay, I adore Holly and Jessica and they sparked my interested in creating something again because they make fun videos that describe the basics so a noob like me can start somewhere. And that’s what I did today. I finally made something. Something that was fun, with no anxiety attached.

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I’ve decided to be Elizabeth from Bioshock Infinite for Halloween. So I made her necklace out of Sculptex Modelling clay.

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Then I made a mold and used Mold Star 16 Fast Set Silicone. It was so cool. Had an awesome texture and color. Easy to work with too!

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The mold was a bit leaky due to lack of glue gun at the time…but it ended up working fine.

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And Ta-DA! My very first mold. :) I’m very proud of myself. It’s been a rough couple of months but this put a huge smile on my face today.

So I thought I would share my accomplishment today and thank Holly and Jessica for motivating me and teaching me new and exciting stuff to get me out of my 3 month long art rut.

-Stay tuned for more stuff-

<3 <3

referencesforartists:

dimespin:

lampfaced:

stephenmccranie:

This essay is kind of the second part of an essay on taste that can be read here: 

http://doodlealley.com/2012/10/01/taste-is-your-teacher/

YES

also, the message made me think of this - 

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Rebloggin’ because this is good stuff.

reblogging this again because it really changed how I feel about my own art and how I view the art world

This…this…all of my FEELS. I would really like to get a beautiful print of this comic and post the pages all over my walls. This is wonderful.

Warmup Sketch

Warmup Sketch - 40 minutes this morning

Elizabeth: “How do you do it Booker?”

Booker: “Do what?”

Elizabeth: “Forget…”

Booker: “You never do Elizabeth…you never do.”

<3 - I probably butchered that quote. I love this game so much. I haven’t finished it yet. No spoilers please!

dresdencodak:

Inspired by Anita Sarkeesian’s Video Game Tropes vs Women, I wanted to pitch a Zelda game where Zelda herself was the hero, rescuing a Prince Link. 

Clockwork Empire is set 2,000 years after Twilight Princess, and is not a reboot, but simply another iteration in the Zelda franchise. It just so happens that in this case, Zelda is the protagonist. I’m a very big Zelda fan, and worked hard to draw from key elements in the continuity and mythos.

This concept work is meant to show that Zelda as a game protagonist can be both compelling and true to the franchise, while bringing new and dynamic game elements that go farther than being a simple gender swap.

Hope you like it!

I would play the shit out of this game….the shit out of it. Nintendo plz. PLZ.

What a stupid day.

Today…was nothing more than a stupid day.

After waiting for 2 weeks I got a rejection e-mail from this company who I was very excited to work for. The interview went well. I felt good about myself and my prospects.

And you know…stuff happens. Maybe it was me, maybe I was too enthusiastic. Maybe my skill set wasn’t robust enough. Maybe they googled me and found embarrassing stuff from high school who knows? Or maybe is wasn’t me at all. Someone may have come by with a better skill set. Or maybe they stopped hiring. Or whatever.


It still makes you feel like a piece of shit no matter how you slice it. Bleh.

So now I don’t know what I want to do. Do I want to go back and work in the video game industry? I don’t know. I love video games more than anything but soul feels pretty crushed at this point. Maybe it’s time to focus on something else for a bit.

This is fun.

(3 Main characters and villain from my current animation project)

Regular posts continuing soon. My job contract ended quite suddenly, so I’ve been searching. It’s very time consuming. Good news is, with the free time I’ve had….I’ve actually been able to animate things. OMG.

Okay so I know I haven’t posted in foreverrrr BLAHBLAHfulltimejobBLAHBLAH

BUT…

My brother’s at NYCC right now, he met Phil LaMarr and took a video of him giving me career advice.

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! I can’t express how amazing this is or how giddy I am right now. I love Phil LaMarr, he’s one of my favorite voice actors and I am indebted to my awesome brother for thinking of me.

AHHH BEST SATURDAY EVER! <3 <3 <3

My thoughts on Brave…

*Note: This post might contain spoilers so I caution you from reading any further if you want to see the movie for yourself…*

Okay we good? Great.


So I saw Brave today. And I have some things to say:

1. This movie is gorgeous. Jaw-droppingly gorgeous. Honestly Pixar stop outdoing yourself. It’s getting ridiculous. No one can compete with you anymore!! Merida’s hair is alive.

It seriously was so well animated. And not just her hair, but Elinor’s and Fergus’ as well. All of their hair matched their character so well it was unreal.

2. Once again Pixar triumphs with their character development. Merida was me at 14. Seriously. She spoke to me on a level that was unreal. I mean, that was exactly how I felt as a young teenager. And I think that almost all adolescent girls go through that stage of rejecting their mothers advice because they feel like their true voice is not being heard. When at the same time, the mother is trying to prevent her daughter from having to go through the hardships she had to endure as a young lady. And it reaches a point where it comes to a head and something drastic is done. For me it was a full out shouting match between me and my mother, which lead our relationship to break down into mere fragments of what it was. It had to be rebuilt into what it is today. Merida went a step further and turned her mother into a bear….a bit much but hey it’s fantasy. It still brought the message across that….in order for a relationship to be repaired, both sides need to listen to one another and change into something new.

It was a powerful message shown through a beautiful medium. I loved it.


That being said, I have one gripe with the movie. And only one.

I feel that at some bits, that powerful message was replaced with gag jokes and filler. I feel that the fighting between the clans and the competition between them for Merida’s hand in marriage wasn’t needed. Sure it added depth to the land and the setting. But this story was about the bond of a family. I would have rather seen more time spent on Merida’s bonding with her Bear/Mother and their adventures together than a showing of how manly/unmanly Merida’s suitors are.

I’ve read about Brenda Chapman’s gripes with the direction of the film and why she ultimately left the film. And I feel that kind of shows. Brave was almost split down the middle between the story of the kingdom and the story of Merida and her mother.

So final thoughts: Brave is a triumph. A beautiful and gorgeous film that made me both smile and cry. But…I hope one day we can have a film that doesn’t have to contain jokes about mens bare bottoms to be successful. (Although I laughed an insane amount at that part).

I loved it. I truly did. I just hope that Pixar can remember what truly makes them successful. It’s those true and deep stories that touch our hearts that keep us coming back for more. Not the butt jokes (^_^).

Also where have you been??!

Meh…Also maybe I should note what I’ve been up to as it’s been a ridiculously long time since I’ve posted on tumblr.

I believe it’s for good reason. I finally got a job in the industry. A lowly game tester job, but it’s still a job. At Sony. Game testing at Sony, fixing your playstations and making sure they work right. Yeaaaahhh :).

It really is a great place, and I’ve met some really great people. It’s nice to finally have something to do everyday. And even though I have less free time, I actually feel like I get more done. I’ve gotten more personal work done (sketches, animation, etc.) in the past 3 months and I feel like I’m making true progress on one of my stories.

That being said, I have a lot of stories. But most of them are turned into proposals and pitches that get saved onto my hard drive only to be forgotten and not fully fleshed out. I am quite frankly nervous/scared to offer my ideas to the internet. The internet can be a scary place.

But I feel good about this one. I honestly think it could go somewhere (even if it’s not very far at all, just somewhere.) But really it all comes down to how bad I want to make it.

And I want to tell this story really bad. :)

I need to get some sleep, my insomnia has really been catching up with me lately. Thanks for tuning in, and I’ll see you soon with a true update.